I just wanna say right off the bat that I LOVE MY HUSBAND! Matt is amazing. seriously, the greatest ever. But sometimes I forget that. It's not his fault, he never ceases to be amazing. It's just that sometimes I let my own pride get in the way of seeing the wonderful man that he is. Example: Today I was unloading the dishwasher and when I opened it I saw how he had put things in there and immediately my thought was, "Gah! He loaded the dishwasher wrong! He totally could have fit more in here!" But then I caught myself and thought, "Wait a minute Brynn! He loaded the dishwasher for you, not because he had to, but because he knew that you've been having a stressful week student teaching. And it wasn't just once that he did it! He's done it all week!" It's a small way for him to serve me and here I was criticizing him for it, shame on me!
Matt is constantly doing things for me that he knows that I hate doing. Like the dishes and laundry. These aren't things that he enjoys doing, but he does them because he loves me. I started thinking about the things that I do for him just because I love him and sadly my list so short. Lots of the things I do because I enjoy them and they have the added benefit of Matt being happy. One of the things that I'm trying to work on this year is doing things not for myself, but for others. So today I made an effort to do something special just for Matt. Matt loves blueberry muffins. I do not. The other day I found blue berries on sale so I got some. Then today I made Matt blue berry muffins. It was so fun to make something for him that I knew that he would enjoy and I enjoyed getting to make them. I'm pretty sure that I enjoyed making them more than I normally would because I was making them for him.
When I was in middle school and high school my parents would tell me pretty often that I needed an attitude adjustment, and being the snotty teenager that I was, I thought they were crazy and I was fine the way I was, they were the ones who needed to change. In all reality I was often in need of an attitude adjustment, I still am. Sometimes I get stuck in my bad moods and I just can't see the beauty and wonder that surrounds me every single day. It's been worse the last 2 months...But every day Matt will tell me how much he loves me and how beautiful I am. Of course I tell him the same thing back. These small things help me to see how lucky I am and they remind me that I really do love him, which is a wonderful thing. I think about how much I love him and I remember that I'm sealed to him for time and all eternity. ETERNITY. Such a wonderful thing. I have so much more time to become the perfect wife that he thinks I am, I don't have to be perfect right now. But I should be striving for it.
Sorry if this is a little jumbled and doesn't flow well, but it's what's been on my mind all day!
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